He who has health has hope. And he who has
hope has everything. -Benjamin Franklin
There’s an old lady in the middle of the room sitting in a wheelchair with her eyes closed. Her shrivel body acting up from what seems to be an uncontrollable nerve tick. Her hands in a prayer position clench to a white handkerchief as her wrinkled and tired eyes close. No one is with her, and I think who else in the room takes notice of this old lady all by herself. I look around and wonder who all these other people are. All of us in the same place sharing the same moment. We wait to be called and vent to the doctor about how bad we feel only to get another prescription offered.
There’s a heavyset woman in front of me. She is looking inside her transparent lavender plastic purse filled with medicine bottles. She must have had at least ten bottles in the bag. There’s a woman next to her talking on her cell. She’s upset about a family situation and the many difficulties she may currently be having. I look away, not wanting to be intrusive so. I turn my eye back to the woman with the purse. “Oh look…she found the bottle she was looking for” With a relieved sigh, she opens it and takes a pill; and then I thought….how sad to have to take so much medication.
The woman in the wheelchair sits there in the middle of the room. “I wonder if she is alone? I wonder what kind of life she’s had.” I look at her frail body, wrinkles, and sagging skin. I wonder who she was. Did she ever love anyone? Did anyone love her? Suddenly the door opens, and a man comes in, asking her if she’s ready to go. He’s the man sent by the transportation company to pick up patients from doctor’s offices. He then pushes her chair, and she says goodbye to everyone. Then I wonder, She’s going home but home to what? Home to whom? I began to feel somewhat uncomfortable looking at so many sick and lonely seniors and listening to the ladies’ phone conversations about how bad she has it. I thought to myself. I became irritated and hoped to get my checkup and get the heck out of there.
I waited for my turn, knowing it would be quick. Get some antibiotics and move on. I was sure all the pain in my whole body was due to a cold coming. As I was writing, I realized that this took place about seven years ago. Today I looked back on that day for some reason. I suppose I was reminded of it because I counted the bottles of medication on my nightstand. The same type of containers that not too long ago, I questioned people having too many. Now that person is me. I sit here alone in my bed. I am tired, have no energy, and cry from pain. My feet were becoming swollen, my head is pounding, and I am scared. Scared that it will get worse and one day…. I’ll be waiting for a transportation company to pick me and take me home. Then I realized I had a responsibility to myself if I didn’t want my health to get worse. Through the years, I have gained a bit worse, and I am now on disability. But this has made me think. It’s really up to me and no one else. I’ve changed my eating habits. I lost 30 pounds, I walk daily, and I keep my mind going. This blog is what’s keeping me together— all on my own, I challenged myself to get it done. I’ve volunteered as much as possible, but most of all, I’ve learned to understand how energy works and how it affects our entire life. The Universe is now on m side, so I will be ok the same way you will.